Intimate Partner Violence During the COVID-19 Pandemic: What You and Your Loved Ones Can Do

By: Wheeler’s Community Justice Unit

Research By:
Christina Caron, Middletown AIC Senior Intervention Specialist
Ambyr Michaud, Bristol AIC Case Manager
Lindsey Tomlinson, Enfield AIC Intervention Specialist

Intimate partner violence (IPV)—often aggravated by external events—has moved to forefront during the COVID-19 outbreak, as families and partners spend more time together at home, struggling with the tensions and mental health impact of job loss, food and other forms of economic insecurity, health-related fears, and isolation. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) defines intimate partner violence as physical or sexual violence, as well as psychological harm by a current or former partner or spouse. About 1 in 4 women, including a disproportionate number of ethnic and racial minorities, and nearly 1 in 10 men have experienced IPV and its related impact during their lifetime. When struggling financially, individuals may be more likely to stay in an unsafe relationship and willing to sacrifice their own safety to have food, clothing, or shelter for their children.

Because of this pandemic, most of us are feeling powerless over much of our lives; however, people who do not manage this feeling or seek to regain a sense of control may take it out on others, using the current conditions as leverage to further isolate, coerce, or increase fear in their relationships. Add to this mix an increase of substance use in the home and the powerful link between substance use and 40 to 60 percent of IPV incidents.

What you can do
If you or a loved one live in a home where there is a threat—or incidences of—intimate partner violence, here are some strategies and resources.

Establish a safety plan for you and your children. Connect with a local domestic violence resource such as CTSafeConnect.com or call 888-774-2900. Advocates are available 24/7 and will work with you to assess your situation and create a safety plan to help minimize risks and protect you and your children from harm. Create code words with your children to communicate if they or you need help, or if they just need space. The links below provide more information about safety plan development.

Making a Safety Plan
Interactive Safety Planning Guide
Path to Safety

Keep your cell phone and electronics charged, and tuck away local domestic violence hotlines and emergency numbers. Statewide phone numbers and resources are included at the end of this article. In case of an emergency, it's best to call 9-1-1.

Assemble a “go bag” in the event you and/or your children need to flee your home quickly. Consider personal and other items needed for the short- and longer-term. Prepare in advance for a situation where an abuser might hide essential supplies such as soap or toothpaste.

Find a safe space where you can reach out to others. Stay out of sight and ear range of an abusive partner if you need to connect with resources such as CTSafeConnect. Make sure that your safe space does not include objects that could be used during an argument, for example, items in your kitchen and bathroom.

Connect with providers via telehealth. While many providers (including Wheeler) are minimizing in-person services, telehealth and telephonic support are widely available. Call our Navigation Center to access care and support at 860.793.3500 or toll-free, 888.793.3500.

Continue to connect with support networks and speak to people whom you trust. There are many options to remotely connect with friends, family, and clergy members, including Skype, Zoom, and Facebook. The more that family and friends are involved and aware of what is happening, the more support they can provide.

Create distance, when possible. Go to another room, take a walk, or watch a tv show. Go outside. Spend time at a nearby park. Take advantage of opportunities to run errands, while maintaining appropriate social distancing.

Avoid difficult conversations. It may be hard to discuss problems when confined to smaller spaces in the home. Employ strategies to diffuse anger. If the anger originates from someone else, quickly exit the interaction, when necessary and possible. Change the subject or leave the room for a few minutes. Avoid triggers, if you can.

Take care of yourself. Earlier this year, experts from across Wheeler shared strategies for self-care during this crisis, from managing your health, to navigating grief and anxiety, to living with your spouse and talking with your children about COVID-19. Click here for related stories, tips, and information.

Know that you are not alone. There are several local and national resources, including Wheeler, 888.793.3500. During this pandemic, the CARES Act, recently signed into law, ensures emergency funds for intimate partner violence survivors and programs that support them. This funding allows domestic violence programs to quickly house and support vulnerable survivors and provides funding for Emergency Solutions Grants and other housing resources. It also supports the National Domestic Violence Hotline, a crucial lifeline during the COVID-19 crisis.

Intimate partner violence is devastating in any circumstance, and it is particularly distressing and dangerous during this period. Help is available. You can protect yourself and your children now and moving forward. Learn more and connect with the organizations below.

Sources: American Society of Addiction Medicine, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Connecticut Coalition Against Domestic Violence, National Network to End Domestic Violence (NNEDV), Substance Abuse Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), U.S. Department of Justice, University of Kentucky

HELP IN CONNECTICUT
Connecticut Alliance to End Sexual Violence 1-888-999-5545 English 1-888-568-8332 Spanish
Connecticut Coalition Against Domestic Violence (CCADV)
CT.gov
CTLawHelp.org, offers guides to assist victims with legal issues, including:

• Court fee waivers
• Court form completion
• Family Violence Leave (leave from work due to family violence)
• Child custody leave

CTSafeConnect.com or call 1-888-774-2900 English 1-844-831-9200 Spanish
State of Connecticut, Office of the Victim Advocate (OVA)
Statewide Legal Assistance 1-800-453-3320
United Way of Connecticut 211 to access safe spaces for survivors

WHEELER PROGRAMS AND SERVICES

Wheeler, Navigation Center 860.793.3500, or 888.793.3500 (toll-free)

Mobile Crisis
If you, a youth in your care, or a loved one are in crisis and would like to speak with someone from a local crisis team, call 2-1-1, and press “1” to be connected to the team serving your town/city.

Community Support for Families, for families referred by Dept of Children and Families
Community Support for Families is a voluntary, family-driven program designed to assist families in strengthening natural and community support systems to maintain safe and healthy home environments. Available in Hartford/Manchester and New Britain/Meriden areas.

Wheeler Programs Serving Individuals Referred by the State of Connecticut, Judicial Branch, Court Support Services Division, and the Department of Corrections

Explore in Bristol, Meriden, New Britain, Middletown, and Hartford
The Explore program provides domestic violence offenders with the information and skills they need to change controlling, abusive, and/or violent behaviors and improve their current and future relationships.

Family Violence Education Program
Wheeler’s Family Violence Education Program provides specialized intervention and education to individuals arrested for the first time for family violence offenses.

HELP NATIONALLY
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
National Domestic Violence Hotline, available 24 hours a day in more than 200 languages at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text LOVEIS to 22522
SAMHSA Disaster Distress Hotline 1-800-985-5990 or text TalkWithUs to 66746.

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION
6 tips from a therapist
Anger Management Tools
Helping Kids During Covid 19
New York Times Opinion Domestic Violence